Defensiveness

1. The relationship traits that are known to destroy marriages include: *

A. Criticism B. Contempt C. Defensiveness D. Stonewalling (Withdrawal)

1. The correct answer is: A, B, C, D

2. When is defensiveness appropriate? *

A. Correct obvious misconceptions or lies B. Defend against false accusations C. Protect yourself from verbal attacks D. Ward off physical abuse

2. The correct answer is: A, B, C, D

3. Defensiveness is problematic when it becomes a PATTERN of attitude and behavior. *

A. True B. False

3. The correct answer is: A

4. The healthy replacement behavior for defensiveness is: *

A. Withdrawal B. Contempt C. Openness

4. The correct answer is: C

5. The "attack" that you perceive as a threat to your happiness may be a "blessing in disguise." *

A. True B. False

5. The correct answer is: A

6. Which of the following are key points for learning openness? *

A. Initially accept what the person is saying to you B. Keep and apply that part which is valuable to you C. Leave (reject) that part which is worthless to you

6. The correct answer is: A, B, C

7. Distorted thoughts or unrealistic expectations make it almost impossible for us to receive criticism in a gracious way, and we become defensive, instead. *

A. True B. False

7. The correct answer is: A

8. A clever twist that can prevent defensiveness and avoid the power struggle in any conflict is: *

A. List the "facts" and take a vote B. Get a referee to officiate the argument C. Argue the other person's case

8. The correct answer is: C

9. What happens when you look at a situation from the other person's perspective? *

A. Defensiveness disappears B. Communication opens up C. Desires are understood D. Love flows

9. The correct answer is: A, B, C, D

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3. Defensiveness

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